I don't much like water....
It's more that I don't like being fully immersed in wetness ... swimming etc.
A water skiing accident as a teenager has made me somewhat cautious of the waters.
But sitting on the poop deck of the Chinese junk, sipping my third Pina Colada, I decided it was the appropriate time to tackle my fear of the water and go for a swim in the turquoise waters of Halong Bay.
I mean, I'd just tackled another major fear just days earlier - spiders - why not water?
Why not ineed?
We weighed anchor by a small beach.
I was mingling with a group of people sipping drinks when I was suddenly possessed with the urge to leap into the water.
I handed a nearby waiter my highball with cocktail umbrella and leapt into the water.
Leapt would be a generous term to describe the falling action as I plummeted towards the oceanic meniscus.
And like a sack of potatoes I disappeared below the surface.
Splash.
What would, ordinarily, have been a slightly silly but rather funny episode quickly turned ridiculous by the single fact i had hurtled into the water at such velocity my clothes had been ripped to shreds and were now floating about me in tatters.
There was a slight bubble as my knickers rose to the surface.
I must applaud the staff for their sensitivity in restoring my modesty as they plucked me from the ocean.